Alone?

Have you ever had the feeling that whatever you're struggling with, you're doing it alone?  Lately, I've felt like that.  I am struggling with so many things right now, but I feel like I can't share those struggles with anyone.  I need the power of prayer, but feel like I would come across as whining or complaining if I were to share these struggles and prayer requests with anyone.  Actually, I know that I'm not alone in these situations, but maybe it's more that I'm afraid of showing people my true self. 
Since our move to the country, I've felt more alone than I've felt in a long time.  I miss having random, last minute play dates, mom nights out, and work-out/chat sessions with friends.  Not only am I missing friends, my kids are too.  We've been out here for 7 months now, but it feels like so much longer.  When will we feel "settled" and not so alone??

Why follow God?

Just finished reading another chapter in "Hope".  The author asked the question - "why are we serving God?"  Amidst pain, suffering, and loss, it's easy to question God.  She poses another question - "Do You not see me?  Do You not love me?"  And the answer to those questions?  "If I turn away from Jesus, where will I go?" 
I am at a point in my life where I am questioning God.  I am asking that same question - Do You not see me, God?  I know God and love Him with all my heart, but still feel confused and hurt.  I feel like I have been living my life the way God wants me to and striving to deepend my relationship with Him.  Despite that, I feel a distance between myself and God.  Hurt, feeling alone and longing for something to take these feelings away, I just have to continue reminding myself that God is still here with me.  So, as "Hope" says "I follow Jesus not because of what He can do for me, but because of what He's already done for me on the cross."  I have to remind myself that I'm not here to 'feel good'.  I am here to love Jesus and show others His love as well.  That is why I follow God.
Why do you follow God?  (Or, why not?)

Hope

I just recently started reading a new book.  It's called 'Hope For The Weary Mom.  Where God Meets You in Your Mess'.  I cannot say enough good things about this book.  It is absolutely amazing.  Has me in tears just about every time I sit down and read it.  Along with the book, I am following an online book club.  Each week (Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays), to go along with the chapter, there is a video and two posts.  It really is comforting to read and watch the video each week and realize that I'm not as alone as I thought I was.  God has brought together women for all across the country to read this book together and share together in our journeys as moms, wives, and children of Christ who are desperately in need of Hope.
If you are a mom and in search of hope, I urge you to get a copy of this book.  http://www.hopeforthewearymom.com/  Check out the posts from the past few weeks.  It's not too late to join in the book study.

April

Answers to prayer

It has been a while, and even though I've had lots to blog about, I just haven't made the time to sit down and do it.  Today, I'm making the time.
A few days ago, I found a bedroom set on craigslist and just knew that we needed it.  It was two twin sized beds (with frames, headboards, and mattress sets), a dreser with mirror, and a night stand.  The price was absolutely unbeatable.  I talked it over with hubby and we decided to go ahead and buy it.  I was sooo excited.  Hubs was a little less than thrilled.  Even though this was a good deal and sure, we would need the beds and they would come in handy for us as the boys get bigger and for guests, he wasn't too sure it was the BEST thing to spend our money on.  However, he said sure, lets get it.  After we were done talking, I prayed and asked God that if it was in His will and we were being good stewards of our (ultimately His) money that it would all work out, and if it was not in his will, then have it not work out.  Well, I showed up at this estate sale (where the bedroom set was being sold) and it was raining.  I had both the boys with me and although it wasn't pouring rain, I didn't want to stand outside and wait for the sale to officially open.  So, we sat in the car and waited.  And I watched as people got out of their cars and started lining up in front of this house.  I knew at that point that I probably wasn't going to get the bedroom set.  But, I still waited and hoped.  Once they opened their door, I hurried and got the boys out and almost ran in the house (not because of the rain, but beacuse I wanted that bedroom set so badly).  As soon as I walked in I asked where the set was and the lady walked me down the hallway (right behind another couple).  They stopped at the set and were looking at it and said that they wanted it.  They were there first and so, rightfully, they got to purchase it.  I smiled at the nice couple and the lady and walked out.
Not being able to buy that bedroom set really did upset me, but in my heart I could hear God telling me that He had answered my prayer.  I KNEW that God didn't think we needed that set and that we could better spend that money elsewhere.  Even though I didn't like God's answer, I know that it was for the best.  I thank God that He listens to and answers my prayers.  And just like I know that my kids don't always like the decisions I make for them, I know they are in their best interest - I know that God's decision was in our best interest.
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Jeremiah 29:11
Thank you God, for the mighty plans that you have for me and my family!

Patience

Before I was a mom, I had LOADS of patience :)  After having my first baby, I realized, that I was not as patient as I had always thought.  Now that I have three children, I KNOW that I am not blessed with patience.  Thinking about this though, I have realized that we start out life as impatient beings...patience is something we need to develop over time.  My almost 10 month old baby is the perfect example : )  When he wants mama, he wants mama RIGHT NOW!  And he'll let me know.  There is no telling him, "just a minute, mama is just finishing up the dishes."  Nope, he needs to be picked up and soothed before the screaming gets so bad that he's hyperventilating, and then it takes even longer to calm him down.
Thankfully, God is not an impatient God.  Despite our impatience with Him, He loves us, answers us patiently, not yelling - "give me a minute, I'm dealing with the rest of the world."
Something to hold on to, is that God is faithful to those who are patient:

Romans 2:7 (ESV)

to those who by patience in well-doing seek for glory and honor and immortality,

he will give eternal life

Full Hands

The other day after dropping Mackenzie off at school I was trying to get myself and both boys inside.  Thomas loves to open doors for me (well, for everyone :)  ) so he wanted me to hold his Eeyore, sippy cup, and whatever else he was carrying at the time.  Well, being mom, I already had my hands full - baby, purse, diaper bag, keys, etc...I told him that I couldn't help him, "mommy's hands are already full."
You know, my hands are full just about all the time.  Sometimes it's literal and sometimes it's figurative, but as "mom" my hands are definitely full. 
When we finally did make it inside, I realized that God's hands are never too full for us or our problems.  Just thinking about that truth made my full hands seem lighter.  If I ever feel like my hands are too full, I just need to remember that I have a God who is bigger and can handle anything!
How amazing is that?!

Another Day

Just wanted to stop in real quick.  My life has been a blur lately.  I've been running almost non-stop. 
So this morning I wanted to stop and take a moment to thank God for today.

Have you thanked God lately?  I know it's so hard sometimes to take the time to really S T O P and sit in a quiet moment of prayer and thank God for all of his blessings, but if you do, it'll be so refreshing!

God knows our hearts, but the act of stopping for Him, I think, is so much more.

Hope your day today is blessed and full of thanks!